Weekly Wrap up. Week 48. My fairy lights fiasco and when I nearly drowned

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My Fairy lights fiasco and when I nearly drowned. Nothing whatsoever do to with Pilates.

Two things happened this week that led me to choose what to chat about. Storm Bert hit us hard and knocked us for six and the other day, someone very kindly said to me that they always admire how organised and seemingly capable I am… 


The story below is totally true and has absolutely nothing to do with fitness, health or exercise. 


Back in distant times, I was living in my lovely cottage in a rural area outside Lymington. It was mid December and I was looking forward to both my daughters returning from University for Christmas and I wanted everything to be perfect for their arrival. The house was decorated, the firewood was stocked up, the fridge was full, the wrapping was done and all was well. 


We had a large apple tree in the garden near the front hedge and I decided it needed to be wrapped in fairy lights for the final touch. Have you ever tried to do this? 


Don’t.


Every job leads to another so first of all, I decided to clear some hedge trimmings and other bits and bobs and started a modest bonfire. Except there was something flammable on the ground and the fire spread quite quickly to the 15ft hedge between me and my neighbours - quite the loveliest, kindest people on earth. I might have shouted an expletive. Clearly one of the lovely neighbours was in the garden.


“Everything alright over there Juliet?” 

“All fine here Simon, thank you!” - God FORBID I bother someone and ask for help. 


I ran to a shed to find something to beat the fire with and as I opened the door, a rat the size of a Shetland pony jumped up in front of me. I screamed.


“Everything ok over there Juliet?”

“All fine here Simon - thank you". Couldn’t possibly ask for help… 


Fortunately Panda, my serial killer Jack Russel was on the case and launched himself through the air, caught hold of and killed the rat before they both hit the floor. George my kind and gentle Labrador then picked it up with his “oh so soft, not a single bite mark” mouth and carried it thoughtfully to deposit at the back door so I may have the pleasure of admiring the kill later. (I do find it fascinating that despite having never worked my dogs, it is so deeply ingrained - the terrier hunts and kills and the retriever - well, he retrieves!)


That little drama over, I spied a rake. This was a true French and Saunders meets Miranda moment and I know you are ahead of me here.. yes, with spectacular fashion, I stepped on the rake end and the pole flew up and whacked me between the eyes. I howled. 


“Everything ok over there Juliet?” 

“All fine Simon. Thank you.” Ask for help? Me?


Rubbing my rapidly swelling nose, I successfully beat the fire, soaked the hedge with my garden hose and all was well. 


Back to the fairy lights. I had bought 3 miles of the blessed things and had them looped, lasso style around one shoulder with a small ladder under the other arm. I propped my ladder against the tree, climbed up and painstakingly wrapped a couple of layers before climbing down, moving the ladder, climbing back up and repeating the process. 


This went on for about 10 mins before I started to get a bit bored. This was clearly going to take FOR EVER. Now before you jump to conclusions, yes, I had checked the lights worked - haha, I am not THAT stupid… but up and down the ladder was really laborious and I was getting frustrated  so I decided to try a different tactic. Getting a big armful, I threw it at the tree, trotted around pulling it through in different places and it sort of worked quite well actually. Until it didn’t. 


Somewhat predictably, it ended up getting tangled in the branches. Big sigh - I got out the big, grown up ladder and climbed up to sort it out. A patient and sensible person would then climb down, move the ladder and climb back up again, repeating as required  but I wanted this job done NOW so I just reached, and reached and reeeeeeeeeeeeeached… (cue the intro music to Casualty) and as I reached the branch, the ladder fell down. So did I. Only my jumper was caught in the branches and I (quite brilliantly) slid upside down leaving my jumper and t shirt caught in the tree and found myself sitting on the ground in my jeans and bra, letting out a big “oof”


Everything ok over there Juliet? 

YES YES, absolutely fine Simon. Thank you.” Ask for help? Bit late now. 


Apart from my nose and rake gate, I was completely unhurt, got dressed and with a fair amount of huffing and puffing, finished the job and let me tell you, that tree looked spectacular. George, Panda, the corpse of a rat by the back door and I were able to stand back and admire my handiwork with such pride, supported by a couple of texts later that evening from friends driving past who ooo’d and aaah’d and much admiration from my lovely neighbours.


 I had THE BEST fairy lights display in the village. 


Until I didn’t.. 


I don’t know if you recall the Winter storms of 2012. They were pretty epic. I had 24 hours of magnificent garden lights before the storm blew in. I was lying in bed, listening to the howling wind and rattling windows,  the banging of gates somewhere and creaking trees,

Was I thinking of the tiles blowing off the roof or the fences blowing down or the huge old Oak tree falling onto the house? Of course not. I was thinking with some despair only of those lights. 


If you are interested, taking broken and totally unrepairable lights down from a tree is far easier and much quicker than putting them up, especially if you are in a bit of a temper and take a few branches with them. Added to my own personal drama was the fact that after so much rain, lots of trees came down taking power lines with them and so we and all the surrounding villages between Beaulieu and  Lymington went into a 10 day power cut, taking us right through Christmas and out the other side. It was all very Larkrise to Candleford as for miles across the forest, we were in a candle lit blackout, staying huddled around fires while the multitudes of freezers stocked for Christmas quietly thawed.


So on to Christmas Eve a couple of days later. A local friend who I dog walked with had a really good idea. “Let’s go and see that how bad that little stream is that has burst it’s banks and is running like a mad, dangerous torrent into the Solent” said she. “What a good idea” agreed I “we can take all our dogs down that tiny, hardly known path that guarantees should anything happen to us, it will be months before we are found.” 


What could possibly go wrong? 


Well, let tell you. The stream was indeed a raging torrent and as we stepped gingerly down the narrow path, the elderly Labrador my friend was looking after slipped and fell into the very deep water. 


My next act was one of the most stupid of my life. I jumped in. Did not stop to take off large coat and Wellington boots. Just jumped right in. Please never, ever be as stupid as me.


 As the dog climbed swiftly out, further down on the other side and started snuffing about, I was swept off my feet and down the river. While my friend ran (yes, ran - that was the speed of it all) alongside me, I was swept seawards. I had absolutely no say in where I was going, I could not stop myself while thinking how after all my efforts with the fairy lights, now I was going to drown on Christmas Eve and what an inconvenience that was going to be. . 


Fortunately the stream narrowed due to a fallen tree which I grabbed hold of and we both dragged me out. Not an easy task fully clothed and wearing wellies! We just sat there in total shock for a while before tipping out the water from my boots and walking home discussing what a fool I was and what a stupid idea it had been.

When I got back, my eldest was in the kitchen making tea on our gas camping stove - (power cut - I already told you).

“Rosie - I was in the river and I nearly drowned” I cried, quite wobbly and emotional. Ever her mother’s daughter, she glanced me up and down and said “but you didn’t though, did you”. 


(On that evening’s news was a report of a man who did drown that day doing exactly the same thing while his dog survived. Thank you Universe)


To conclude - my Mother told me many, many  times, if you ever need to get a job done, call Juliet. However, while capable, I am also the most stupid person I know!


(N.b. my lovely neighbours still tell me how much they miss me and how it has never been as entertaining since…. )


This Christmas, why not give your loved ones the gift of health and wellness! 


I can provide you with a card to write your message of love and best wishes while together we lure the unsuspecting recipient over to the oniline side..... pay me for a month for the gift of love for your treasured friend and they can then contact me when they are ready and I will subscirbe them from my end. Thing is, if you have gone to all that trouble, they will feel obliged to join and then haha.... we have them captive!! Before they know it, they will love it as much as we do and will thank you for ever more. 


Oh yes they will!! 

Sunday stocking fillers

Clare and I have been discussing who has been naughty or nice, making lists and checking them twice and we bring to you

The Sunday Stocking fillers.


Sundays 9am leading up to Christmas.


Clare starts proceedings this Sunday 1st December at 9am for a 30 min class. I follow next week, Clare the week after and you have me for the last pre Christmas Sunday. All details will be in your calendar; (psst - glitter, reindeer horns, Christmas t shirts, bauble earrings... we expect no less)

You are WELCOME.

You will see that my website has had a refreshing facelift and I am delighted with it!  If you are new to the site you will find clearer info on what we get up to and if you are a regular member I hope you find the membership area a little easier to navigate. There are always a few minor teething problems as my site is live and active with access to the library and calendar so thank you members for the odd hiccough and thank you Becky for the super job!!


Monthly challenge.

I will be posting on "the gram" on Sunday morning and also putting a short recording up in the library for our December challenge. Don't forget to have a look.


I cannot WAiT to see so many of you next Thursday for our third annual Christmas lunch. I know that many of you are travelling from far and wide as well as our more local members and I really look forward to a wonderful get together.  To give me time to get turned around there will be ONE class on Thursday 08.30am to blend the two together. 




New in the library this week. 


Tuesday and Friday strength classes week 4


Clare's Barre inspired Pilates 


Frday 9am move and mobililse (all levels) 


Coming up 


oh this is me at my BEST- watch out in your calendar for 


Tinselates 

Christmas ballballs

The 12 Moves of Christmas 

Run Rudolph Run 

Christmas crackers 

(there is A LOT more where that came from!!)



Finally - a few thoughts to ponder -

If you ever fancy fairy lights in your trees, employ the services of a professional.

NEVER, EVER jump into a river after a dog.



Have a great weekend and see you Sunday morning!! Jx 


 

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By juliet May 15, 2025
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By juliet May 8, 2025
So that was a busy weekend. As Lou and Clare were coming to the end of an epic 100km run around the Isle of Wight I was settling in for an early night before taking my bike over to ride the 100km the following day. I have never seen so many bikes - the ferry we were on had only 2 cars and otherwise it was wall to wall bikes with a lot of lycra in the lounges! Bearing in mind people were arriving on ferries from Portsmouth and Southampton as well as Lymington, that was A LOT of cyclists. The group I was in were faster than I would normally ride so it was quite the challenge. When we first sat down in the ferry and I saw one of our group wearing a "Team GBR Triathlete" I felt slightly doomed and to be fair, we were pretty fast straight from the onset.... I could see my 2 little energy bars were not quite going to cut it. This was going to take a lot of gritted teeth and hoping for the best. Very early on, Lou was driving (trying to avoid the thousands of cyclists) and overtook me, so she kindly pulled in and took a little video of us going past (pic above) and it was lovely to see her. Do you KNOW how hilly the island is? They just keep coming.. and you sort of can't really enjoy the downhill as you know it will only be short-lived before you start the climb again. I knew that I would do it. If I put my mind to something I will stick to it despite how much I may overthink and worry but I knew that I would finish it, no matter what. A small achievement to many but the start of something new for me and being in a group, God forbid I held anyone up. It was actually a year to the day... it was last year that I went over to the Island to watch Lou and Clare run 50km (although I did sort of wander off and find our island member Sarah and spent a very happy afternoon in her bluebell wood eating home made chocolate brownie but I was thinking of them) but I really missed being part of the event. After so many years of running, I realised how much I missed the build up and anticipation of an endurance event: the sense of camaraderie and being in something together . It was off the back of that that saw me come home and buy my first proper bike - I mean proper as in all the others have been acquired along the way and have been older and heavier than me. I have snuck off and done a few bits and bobs here and there and of course, had the shock of how much work I have to do to keep up with the clubs I have joined but here we are - one year later and a 100km ride around the island. The Military Road is forever etched in my memory - it was only 20 miles or so from the end and my legs were tired. Somehow for a short while, I found myself out of my group and riding alone and as I tried to ride up this endless hill, cycling slower than a toddler dawdling along, I was literally shouting out loud "WHY do I do this to myself? WHAT is this teaching me about myself?".....but keep peddling I did. You see we are funny creatures - the whole psychology behind a challenge is massive. Once I knew I was into the last few miles, I allowed myself to feel and acknowledge how tired my legs were - until we realised we could make the 5pm ferry at which point I found a new energy and powered on faster and stronger than ever - I was NOT going to miss that ferry! As I say, not a big deal to lots of people who did it and nothing like the achievement of Lou and Clare (I can't even begin to imagine how deep they had to dig) BUT I am chuffed and it is the first step on the ladder. It is all relative isn't it? What is not much to one person is a massive challenge to the next - whatever it is, be it physical or otherwise, to succeed in something that requires courage, discipline and commitment is worth celebrating. We have to dig deep to push out of our comfort zone but when we do, the feeling of achievement is so self rewarding. Sometimes I think we forget to reward ourselves or give recognition for when we have gone outside our comfort zone and achieved something and we deserve to remember - a pat on the back or a mental high five even if it is not shared with anyone else can really boost our mood and if we have tried, we ought to (even very quietly) give ourselves a "well done me!" For me, meeting and chatting to like minded people who are all there for their own reasons. Some built like professional athletes, some not, all doing their best - all encouraging and supporting each other. Mind you, the ones who whizzed by at the end while my legs were falling off, saying things like "nearly there".... not so keen on them to be honest! What next? I think I need to buy a road bike now to start the collection... this could become the new passion..... will I keep going... yes of course I will... I think....
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USE IT OR LOSE IT! I saw a post on instagram that I shared today. It is a video of a large family posing for a group photo, with many of them sat on the floor. Once the photo has been taken, they try to get up and that is where chaos happens (along with a lot of laughter) as they are clinging onto eachother, trying to get to their feet and getting into a total heap. Very funny... but also not... I was involved in a workshop today at Limewood and the phrase "Use it or Lose it" came up in the presentation. We all know the saying and can use it quite flippantly but how about acknowledging that if we no longer perform that particular activity, our body thinks it is no longer required and we find we CAN'T perform that movement. We need to condition our body and therefor when we first try a new exercise for example, we can feel quite unstable or uncoordinated and lacking in proprioception but as we repeat and practise, the move becomes more familiar and we grow in confidence and ability. Think of some of the sequences we do in Pilates or some of the more complex moves in our weights work - not for the faint of heart and performed only once we have built up the skills and have the coordination and understanding of what needs to go where. However as we stop doing those (or any other)moves they quickly become harder to reach. If you haven't seen it, do please watch "Secrets of The Blue Zones" on Netflix - about communities where people not only live beyond 100 but do so with good physical and mental health. It is a superb watch but the factors are the same in each community and one of them is of course, exercise, be it walking up a practically vertical hill to church or getting onto hands and knees to tend the garden daily. Whatever you do or don't do, please don't be the one rolling around because you cant get up from the floor!! Using it beyond all reason this weekend however are Lou and Clare - please join me in wishing them the very best of luck as they set off together at 6.45am on Saturday to run 100km around the Isle of Wight. If you recall, they did 50km last year and that achievement set them up for going the full distance this year. It also did something else as I went over to watch them and had a bad case of missing out, as I can no longer run and realised how much I missed the training and camaraderie of an endurance event and it was off the back of this experience that I came home and bought a new bike. So a year (and lots of cycling and joining a club) later, I am also off to the island on Sunday to cycle 100km on the IOW Randonnee. I respect that my challenge is nowhere near the scale of what Lou and Clare are undertaking but there are some big old hills over there... good job we have a Bank Holiday Monday to recover!! 
By juliet April 24, 2025
Blink and you miss it. There went Easter. I hope you all had a lovely time doing whatever you got up to and we now enter the summer term. I mean we don't really have terms but if we did, this is it... exams, summer uniform, netball and cricket and dusting off the bbq's. Personally, none of that really applies to me... well perhaps the summer uniform as I drag my shorts blinking and yawning from the back of the drawer. As for netball - I used to absolutely love it. I was always in the school team, playing Centre or Goal defence and did briefly join Lymington as an adult. When my girls were at prep. school, they reinstated a teachers v parents netball match and we won by a country mile -none of us really knew how but me being me, I went full out to start a mum's netball club one evening a week. Before we knew it, "friends" had mentioned us to the Bournemouth and Southampton leagues. This was very, very scary as we were just running up and down shouting "is that allowed? what are we supposed to do here? did that count?" so clearly in our infancy and anyway, we didn't have any matching kit but we did have a lot of fun - well, until someone went over on her ankle which promptly broke and that was the end of that. I have been spared life as a cricket mum or widow but sitting in a deckchair for hours in the sunshine pretending to watch sounds wonderful to me. As I watch my nephews revving up for the start of GCSE's, I thank my lucky stars those hideous days are behind me. I have a vivid memory of sitting at the kitchen table trying to revise while my mother sat outside in the garden listening to Wimbledon on the radio and the two are forever linked for me. Wimbledon with exams not my mother. Apparantly we have wonderful weather next week so dig out your sunscreen and if you can make it, I will be teaching on the beach for Monday and Tuesday's classes. We went through the 34 Moves recently and the upside down/inversion moves are usually the ones that need the most practise. You can really get a deep dive into these moves on the studio equipment if you ever go to a studio but we have several in our mat work - Roll over, Rolling moves, High bridge, Control balance, High Scissors and Bicycle. Remember that Joseph Pilates' philosophy was to perfect on the studio equipment and practise on the mat, hence we use all sorts of equipment and creativity to recreate as close to the studio work as we can for the vast majority of us who do not have access to a fully equipped studio. Why inversion? Gravity can lead to compression of the spine and their little shock absorbers known as discs that can become dehydrated. When we tip our body upside down, we can reverse the gravitational pull. This can help to create more space between the verterbrae and studies suggest that this allows for the discs' soft tissue to absorb moisture and rehydrate and plump up. Exercises like Roll over or the rolling moves can provide a massage for the spine and fascia as well as improving spinal mobility and of course, abdominal strength. (please note in photo above, my right arm is not perfect - my wrist should be flat and my arms could be stronger and better connected to the floor but it was the best pic I could find for now and I wasn't sharing that space with anyone else so it was a mediocre me or nothing!!!) Want more? Well, it is widely believed that being upside down can stimulate the lymphatic system and help with lymph drainage. Also the action of being upside down can increase blood flow to the stomach and therefor help with digestion and digestive issues. You don't need to be performing an advanced Control Balance move - some of the rolling moves and spinal extension we have been working on do the job in a modified way and anyhow, high blood pressure, glaucoma and spinal issues are some of the reasons why full, advanced inversion is not ideal - there are always ways to adapt, modify and practise safely. What we established in our 8am class yesterday was how many ways we can break down, build up and practise. For example, consider the Roll up, Roll down and Roll over as exactly the same exercise but variations come from the position you start from, how you work against gravity and whether it is your upper or lower body that moves. Thinking about Roll over, and going into the inverted positions (where your hands support you from under your hips), we worked on how to open up the chest, the need for strength through the traps, lats and triceps, length in the hamstrings, strength in the core and so much more. So for example, to improve High Scissors, you could consider side lying chest opener, Roll down with arms behind you, Saw and upper body only double leg kick - all moves to open up the chest and strengthen the upper body. In addition, hamstring and hip flexor stretches. Focus on pelvic floor and deep core connection so lots of abdominal and core strengthening- we could (and do) a whole class on moves to prepare us for one single and seemingly evasive exercise. What we do know is that to get better, we need to practise - a few daily exercises relevant to what you need to build on will make ALL the difference so.... with that in mind, I am going to start planning some workshop style classes again as we haven't done this for a while so your input would be welcomed. What moves really challenge you and what would you like to work on? I will get my creative hat on and build a class around the strength, stretch and mobility we need to focus on. What I continue to hear from you (and feel for myself) is the benefit of building strength from lifting weights and how that really helps with your Pilates progess. Isn't it great!!
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